A Song for Matt on the Anniversary of our Engagement*

Time of Gratitude*

Twenties minutes more to cook for the potatoes so I'll take the twenty to reflect on all I have to be thankful for this year:
* Matt- my wonderful love of my life
* our beautiful love that continues to grow
* our excitement for our future together
* our warm and cozy home and the improvements we make on it
* the price increase of its value that will make all the work feel justified not just for pleasure (hey, might as well be thankful for what's to come)
* our future children who we can't wait to welcome to this world
* our families and their health and well-being this year
* our friends and their health and well-being this year
* time with Pam before she passed
* our beautiful wedding and the financial help paying for it
* the number of supportive friends and family who were there to celebrate with us
* healthy babies born to my friends
* our pets and their easy-going attitudes and health, and the joy they bring
* our jobs and their flexibility, reliability, and stability
* a generous gift that helped us improve financially
* safe traveling
* the week we were able to spend in Idaho, despite the circumstance
* visiting Joe and getting to spend time with him
* winning several weeks of our college pick-em
* getting to take my mom to Chicago
* the amazing and surprising proposal on Dec 14, 2010 :)
* Matt being willing to move here and enjoying it so far
* making new friends
* good food
* setting good financial goals to lead us to wealth
* positive thinking
* that I feel so much more calm and happy than I've ever felt
* coaching Girls On The Run
* our health
* running and adrenaline highs
* our beautiful mountains views and forests and river
* positive relationships with family
* beautiful weather today
* fun technology :)
* my girls' weekend at the beach
* my bachelorette party and having such great friends as coworkers
* going to bed early to cuddle with my husband while watching sitcoms
* the fact that getting up at 7am doesn't kill me anymore
* laughing
* good music
* turning 30 :)
* the ability to keep faith
* coffee
* seeing friends and family get what they've been desiring
* special time alone on our honeymoon
* the opportunity for the grading papers job to discover how much I did not want continue
* cookies
* the opportunity to work from home

Time for a New Decade*

Today is my 30th birthday. When I don't think about whatever my expectations for 30 were -- to be married, owe a home, have children, have my finances figured out and a job I loved (most of that is true) -- I'm excited about moving into this new decade of my life. Twenties were a time of self definition. I won't say "discovery" because I think you always know who you are, even though you change throughout it.

When I think of twenties, I see myself as a lonely, melancholy English major walking to class in the rain, wondering about the future of my life and daydreaming about doing anything else. I see myself feeling fiercely about many things, and people. I see myself driving that beat-up Subaru too fast over the pass and really loving the saying "you can sleep when you're dead" and quotes and tragic stories and emo music and rebelling against materialism and what was expected. I see myself giving too much without recognizing and asking for what I wanted and needed. I see myself feeling so adult getting my first job out of college and feeling frustrated that I felt coworkers and clients just viewed me as an ignorant young kid. I see myself feeling too young to be married as I watched my friends tie the knot, too young to be a parent until I was present when Jenn gave birth, then really knowing what I wanted my future to look like. I see myself struggling, struggling with relationships, struggling with my recovery, struggling in Texas, struggling to stay positive. I see myself eventually trying to have faith, believe with an unwavering belief, learning to really assert myself, meeting the love of my life, feeling finally grown up, and ending the decade with the excitement of getting engaged, of marrying my dream guy, of getting to be ready to be a parent.

I am glad it happened how it happened til now I suppose. I wasn't ready in myself to be where I am now. Honestly I'm glad my 20s are over. Because although I think I may need to leave behind super short mini skirts (maybe...) and glittery girly makeup (ok, actually no) and the ancst of being a young adult, I saw my thirties as being a time of doing, of feeling set in myself and confident, of masterfully completing my job, of managing my affairs with at least some experience, of feeling the respect that comes with age, of being a grateful and loving wife, of soon becoming a providing and loving mother, of being a good advice giver and... moving ahead in my life with more sureness and joy and trust. I look forward to this next decade of creation and boldly living out our dreams. I see my 30s as stepping into my power. Rocking my life. I'm excited for what lies ahead.

Goals for my 30s (which may or may not be too lofty):
* Love Matt with all I have and continue to build our beautiful relationship
* Create our family
* (re)get fit and maintain health to ensure long, healthy life
* Eat more substance and less junk
* Buy a (somewhat) larger house with a big yard, big trees, a living room, a flat driveway for a basketball hoop, a little larger bedrooms, a front porch for sitting...
* Go on a cruise
* Go to Europe
* Live in joy, trust in spirit, smile, think positively, express gratitude
* Appreciate my job and try to engage myself as much as possible
* Establish a strong financial plan and stick to it
* Learn some new great go-to recipes
* Spend quality family time

Wow I thought I'd have more goals for 10yrs but maybe that's too much time to tackle. I'll make the rest as I go along, and shorter term goals :)

New Floors!*

For anyone who saw the floors in our house, hopefully you don't necessarily remember how gross the carpet was... but it was. No matter how many times I vacuumed or shampooed, the stains (mostly from the previous occupants but some for the various dogs who have lived in the house) would come back. Some of the rooms had a generally funky smell.

And thanks to Matt's handiness and my brute strength, and little loan from my folks, we were able to replace all our carpet with laminate wood floors!



To make the floor continuous from the living room (carpeted) to the kitchen (laminate on particle board), we ended up having to rip out particle board that was stapled to the subfloor in the dining room and kitchen. Otherwise there would have been about a 1/4-1/2 inch step up into the kitchen/dining room.

It was a horrible job because the particle board just wants to chip into fist-size or smaller pieces and the staples were so long that if I jammed a crowbar under it and lifted as much as possible with the crowbar, it wasn't enough to get the staples out so I had to loosen, then pry off as much as possible before it chipped a small chunk. Then we didn't have the right tool to cut the particle board against the cabinets (since the cabinets were laid on top of the particle board) so I tediously chipped away at it. We ended up putting some molding to hide it (not pictured here).

Our master looks great now! It's painted a deep red wine color on half the walls with the other half and the ceiling as a reddish tan...



AND because we can't stay on one project at a time, we also redid our fireplace...

Before -- I hated the glued-on tiles. It might've looked good if they'd gone all the way up the wall with it. But they were cheap and it looked cheap. I wanted a mantle.

After

What I Know About Love*

The Best Relationship/Love Advice I Received: Just because this is the best you've had so far... doesn't mean it's the best that's out there for you, or the best that's possible. You have to be brave enough and have enough faith to be patient for the relationship you really want. And it will find you. ~ Jesse

A year and a half ago... two years ago... maybe I would have given different advice about love. I hope not, but maybe. I'd like to think I've had enough experiences by now to give good advice. Two years ago, after all the disappointments of the past and dating and trying to find someone awesome, I was in a relationship that seemed to be pretty good. Nice guy. He had a nice family. He had a decent job. We liked a lot of the same things. He was sweet and funny. We had fun together. But... but... There was a "but." But I wished he was just a little more ____. Insert "attentive," "mature," "sure," whatever else. Things were fine, mostly. He was the best relationship I'd had. I felt so much healthier with him than with anyone before. I told Jesse, "but he's a great guy and this is the best relationship I've had..." to which she replied "just because this is the best you've had so far... doesn't mean it's the best that's out there for you, or the best that's possible."

I am beyond grateful for her advice. It's true, at the time, I didn't want to break up with him. And he never really did anything to warrant it. Things were fine between us. Sure, I wished they were better but it's not like there was a problem. Except I just wanted... more. I wanted someone (honestly) just like Matt. And in the past, in my other relationships, I clung to them as if the more time and love I poured into them, the better they'd eventually be. I thought, if it's not broke, why ditch it? Why would I want to be out there, single, lonely, wishing I had someone, when right now I do have someone? It's scary to let someone go. And it hurts. And I missed him. And I second guessed myself.

But let me tell you... it is worse to be with someone and have doubts than to be alone. Okay, yeh, being alone sucks. I cried myself to sleep plenty of nights, wondering when I was going to meet someone, when was I going to get my true love story, when was I going to fall in love and have him love me and get married and do all that, when was it my turn... But that was surprisingly easier than pushing down those feelings of doubt, of frustration, of insecurity, when I was with the wrong person.

You can have the relationship you want. You just can't have it with whomever you think you want to have it with, or whenever you want it. Can you find the perfect person for you? I think you can. Or at least you get so close, that the things you thought would matter, don't matter. The things I thought would be deal breakers, aren't. Some things bother me, some things I wish were a little different, but I know that Matt is the best match for me, that the connection we have is so special and is exactly what I always wanted even before I had the experience to know what I wanted, that the rest of that stuff doesn't matter.

When we first kissed, I did think "this could be my last first kiss." And maybe other times that seemed a little terrifying like "wait, maybe I'm not sure if I'm ready for a last kiss. To never fall in love again with someone new. To never again have the first date. The first night together. A new 'how we met' story to tell." But kissing Matt I just thought "Thank GOD! If this is my last first kiss, I'm going to be a very happy woman with this man." And in falling in love with Matt, I never thought "it's not that I want to be with someone else necessarily... because I remember that I was unhappy being single..." I thought "I don't even want to be with anyone else. I am so thankful I found Matt. I'll never be with anyone else" and I felt joyful about that.

So how did I know? I think it was past experiences (figuring out what I really wanted in a partner) and age. I'm so glad I waited. I'd encourage anyone to wait until they're at least 28 to get married. Thankfully I didn't marry who I was dating at age 21. I think people change so much in their mid-20s...

But also it was being clear on the relationship I wanted, both in being clear on who I wanted to draw into my life and in how I talked with him about what I wanted. We were very honest and open with each other about what we were looking for and what we wanted our future to look like. If we had extra money, how do we prioritize things? Are we savers or are we splurgers, or both? What sort of lifestyle do we want? Where? What sort of house? How much do we need? What do prioritize- home, travel, both? How do we feel about our parents getting older and would we care for them? Do we want to have traditional gender roles or how might our relationship look? What about the division of household labor? How might we handle different situations with children? How will we practice spirituality/religion? ... A friend of mine said she read a book called 1001 Questions to Ask Before You Get Married. Matt and I are compatible in the ways we know we'll have to be in the future.

Sure, I was a romantic in the past, and naive. And I thought a few times "this could be the guy I marry. He's cool. I could totally marry him." But if push had come to shove, would I have married Richard? I'm not sure. I had doubts. And I think to a degree both he and I were trying to protect each other's feelings by staying together, thinking someone the other couldn't sense it. At least he did that. And I could always tell he had doubts, and had one foot out the door, even when he pretended it wasn't true. We weren't doing each other any favors by staying together. Was it wasted time? Sometimes since I thought so but I'd say no. I learned from it. I just wish I hadn't taken it as seriously. That I'd taken it for what it was- a college romance, a practice in figuring out how to be with someone and what I really wanted and how I wanted to be, how to work through issues as a couple, how to be a partner and how he wasn't able to be the partner I wanted. I wish I'd known then how much better it would be in the future with Matt. If I'd just have given it the time and patience and clarity of thought and faith to wait for Matt and I to be ready for each other.

At least I finally met him. And things are awesome :)

And then I went and stressed anyhow...*

So when trying to start a family, one is not supposed to stress, since it could take some time. But how can I not when it will be so huge and life-changing when it happens, and it's such a long, drawn-out process? I've never been a patient person anyhow. This is hard. And I didn't even think I'd be emotionally-invested yet... but how can I not be when I'm waiting for the moment that I know our lives will be changed for the rest of them?

I was planning to take a more carefree approach. But then I find myself feeling excited thinking maybe we succeeded this month... and then feeling very disappointed when that's a negative. I surprised myself by how disappointed I felt. I'm gonna chalk that up to hormones... But it really makes me feel terrible for couples who try to get pregnant for years. That must be so discouraging and a little heartbreaking each month to find out your family plans are yet another month out.

It's just so much waiting... waiting and hypothesizing when the time is right, waiting to find out, waiting to see if it was just too early to see, waiting to see if I'll feel something different... And I know, logically, that it could/probably will take some time. My head knows that.

But then there's also this other part, that only really says anything at around 3am when I wake up and can't get back to sleep, that thinks "whoa, this would be huge. Maybe it's okay if it's not time yet. Maybe it's okay if it's not this week but next week. Maybe I still can't imagine how I'll truly feel and react when I know it's a sure thing." What is that about? Is that like baby-making cold feet? Geez I didn't feel that getting married... and that's huge and life-changing but I was just so excited to be married to Matt (and happy now to be).

I just keep trying to have some faith that when the timing is right, it'll be. And until then I don't need to stress or overthink it. I read some quote online that this woman used whenever family asked her when she and her husband were going to have a baby. She said something like "well there's three of us that have to agree on the timing, and my husband and I are on board..." The third was God in her case. But it's weird when people start asking me about it, friends, family, my bosses... because we only told family, and a few friends, that we were going to start trying so how does work know? And then it's just this drawn out thing and people are asking "so.... anything NEW with you?" I don't know. Maybe. Maybe there's something huge and life-changing. Maybe I felt like there were some indicators. Maybe not. Then I feel a little uptight and could use a beer or glass of wine to help me relax but dang it, better not, just in case... It'd be nice if it was just very clear from the first moment. Ahh life's great huge surprise.

Sunday's Bend Bulletin Featuring US!*

In Honor of Pam*

In the two event (Christmas visit and our wedding) that I spent with Matt's stepmom Pam, I mainly was struck by her optimism. Though she'd been struggling with liver bile duct cancer since 2008, and it had returned in late 2010 to eventually take her, Pam never sounded bitter or upset about her fate. She told me at Christmas that you just have to appreciate every day. Even at our wedding, she told us that she was beyond typical treatment but she'd just wanted to be able to be strong enough to attend our wedding, and another a week later. She knew she didn't have much time but she seemed so resolved to it, strong.

She was a talkative, friendly and open woman. Matt loved to play card games with Pam and his dad and told me that it was fun to visit them because they always had some fun activity. Pam was also very crafty and gave Matt several beautiful quilts she'd made. She read "The Art of a Good Marriage" during our wedding ceremony, which she volunteered to do, and Matt and I were honored that she could be part of our wedding in that way.


During our wedding weekend, Pam tried to be strong and enjoy as much time as possible with us. We could see a dramatic difference in her energy from Wednesday to Sunday when they left. From there, she slowly slipped away, holding on and fighting to the end.

Pam passed away on Sunday, July 24, 2011. Matt and I spent last week in Blackfoot, Idaho with his father, helping him clean out a little but mainly just trying to be present (since her services were already planned). She was only 59, and he is 57. It seems so young for someone to pass, and I just hope that she got to do many of the things she thought she'd do in this life. (her obituary)

Baby Making Facts I Just Learned*

• It takes the average healthy couple 6-12 months to conceive.
• A woman not on birth control in her early 20s has a 20-25% chance of conceiving each month. By late 20s it's 15-20%. By early 30s it's 10-15%.
• Sperm can live for up to 3 days (sometimes longer) but...
  
• Once an egg is released from the ovary and floats through the fallopian tube, there is only a 12-24hr window during which it can be fertilized. After that it disintegrates.

(I started reading What to Expect Before You're Expecting, just to get a jump start understanding what may be ahead for me.)

With those statistics, how in the world does anyone get pregnant?! Really, those are not great odds. I think about teenagers getting knocked up accidentally. Seriously, talk about bad timing of that sex. Honestly I do think it's a miracle. Yet some people manage to do it many times. Amazing.

The stress for me mainly has been thinking about timing. My gyno recommended that we wait three months after I quit taking birth control to get in top baby-making shape (mainly building up uterine lining since the pill I took thinned it out as one of its duties), then expect it to take at least a year but not to stress it. I started doing the math and it's just really overwhelming. When do I stop the pill? Do we wait the three months (trying to avoid getting pregnant) or just give it a go (since hey, if it actually takes, must mean everything was fine enough)? Do I want to do all the planning/charting or take a it'll-happen-if-it-happens attitude? Am I ready if I was to get pregnant right away? Don't I want to start trying, if it does take awhile, before I get to feeling really anxious and eager for it to happen? And then do I want to try to time it, if that's possible? Should I try to avoid getting pregnant nine months before a big conference for work, do I care about when I'd go on maternity leave and what would be convenient for work? Do I believe in astrology enough to try to hit a baby into the signs I like? Seriously it's stuff to consider!

I realized, after a few weeks of thinking and stressing about this, that if I found out today I was pregnant, I'd be (well freaked out a little and scared but also) okay and excited about that. Especially since I'd have to be, there's no other choice, it'd have already been decided. It's the decision of timing it out that has me overanalyzing. I guess I'd feel more comfortable just leaving it up to... chance, to God and the universe, to fate, to whatever :) If I believe in some sort of grand planning and not just randomness, which I do to some degree. If I felt like it was in someone else's control, I think I'd feel better. Isn't that strange? As much as I like to have control over things, and that's the very thing I'm stressing about is how much control I have over this, I'd actually feel relieved to believe that the timing was divine timing. So I took that as my answer.

How Do You Know...*

How do you know when you're ready to expand your happy family of two? Or family of five if you count the dogs and cat?

As the wedding drew near, this became a popular topic of conversation in our house, particularly because Matt has baby-fever, and has for quite awhile. In terms of his mental and emotional preparation to be a father, he's apparently been ready for a long time. Whereas I've finally realized that I'm in a relationship in which when I do get pregnant, it will be a cause for joy and celebration, rather than a potential disaster, which is a strange feeling, and a relief.

But there's so much to consider. My new-mom friends spent my bachelorette weekend (intentionally or unintentionally) giving me guidelines/warnings/etc about starting a family. Be sure you have a stable foundation in your relationship, like really stable. Everything changes, EVERYthing, and there's no way to prepare for that. Be sure you've done everything you've wanted to do without a kid first- go on all the trips you want to take, travel, have fun. I get it. And I also know that I don't get it... because how can you really understand what it means when someone says that everything changes and in ways you can't ever anticipate and there's no way to prepare for that?

But for Matt and me, I think we have an awesome relationship. The difference with us, vs other relationships I've been in, is that we have a very open and easy communication. I can tell him things that upset me, sometimes without sounding too upset, and he is so calm and so cool and reassuring and tries to be understanding. He's just wonderful. Neither of us like conflict or fighting... a friend asked me (meaning to be a little defensive of me, I think, and sess out if I was in a good relationship or not) how we fight... I think she wanted to hear that I stand up for myself, blah blah. And I didn't know what to say because we don't "fight." We barely have arguments. Sometimes we'll say something that upsets the other, but it's pretty clear to us when that is and we work quickly to resolve it. We are peace-makers yet I don't feel that I'm compromising myself.

And I really can't think of anything I'd like to do before having kids? Run a marathon? I only want to do that because Matt's trained for it a few times and kept injuring himself, and if it's a goal of his then I could help him accomplish it. Go camping? Sure, easy enough. Go on trips? Sure, if we had any money. We can't even afford to go on a trip. Plus there are only a handfull of places that right now we currently want to go- Europe, particularly Ireland (though I could wait on that), Boston MA, and Vegas. Both Matt and I have traveled so much in our jobs, there really aren't a ton of places we're set on seeing. Plus obviously travel with kids is harder and more expensive, but that would be fun eventually too.

There is also finances to consider. This causes me anxiety but I realize that if we were to wait until we're where I'd like to be financially before starting a family, that would be at least a few years from now. And yeh everyone says I have plenty of time... hey I'm turning 30 this fall. I do want to be a mom while I'm still sorta young, and within a reasonable age range of my kids' playdates' moms.

It's hard to say "let's put it off" when you're with someone who is so sweet, and so loving, and will be such an amazing dad, and really wants it, would be overjoyed if it was true today. But am I ready to be a mom?

It seems like I should feel baby-crazy... but then I wasn't exactly wedding-crazy before meeting Matt either... okay maybe a little, I might've looked at everyone's wedding pics on Facebook and wondered when I would get to meet my Mr. Right. But I've never been the kind of girl who gets crazy about babies. They're kinda drooly and unpredictable and I just don't feel a strong pull toward them the way some women I know do. The closest I've ever come toward that feeling was holding my dear friend Jenn's son Chase when he was a baby. At our friend Mandy's wedding, I held him and I could've frozen time in that moment and been happy forever. I just had this feeling of complete contentment and love for him. Maybe it's because I was at the hospital when he was born, heard his first cry with my ear pressed to the room's door, or maybe it's because I love Jenn like a sister, and she was my first friend to have a baby. I know I'll feel that, and stronger, with my own kids. I just don't often feel it with other people's kids.

Then I think, well I want time to enjoy just Matt, just Matt's attention and just being newlyweds. But that would be just more time. I mean, it's the same wonderful togetherness as it has been the past year. And that will just continue. Waiting is just more time together. Which will be great.

And the worst reason yet, sometimes I just feel a little bored. And lonely. Not that this is a good reason to have a child. But as my friend Jesse joked, "sometimes we're just sitting around, kinda bored, can't figure out what to do that evening, and think hey maybe we should have a kid." Or as my mom pointed out "well, then there is no shortage of things that need to be done."

But it does seem, as we ride around with the pups in the car, that having a kid, or two, in there would just make it that much merrier. So much more to share. So much more love.

Wedding Short Video*

My amazingly talented brother Joe edited this short wedding video for us.

The song, "Smile" by Uncle Kracker, is the song to which I walked down the aisle (because it's the first song that Matt told me made him think of me when he heard it, and when I knew he was falling for me).

It's the most beautiful video I've ever seen :)

http://www.vimeo.com/25534398

Wedding Pics-- preparation*

My uncle Mike was a LIFE SAVER in our wedding setup. I have no idea how we thought we'd get everything done without him! My mom and I conceived this alter idea. We wanted something grand and original and I thought that the organza would soften the look of distant branches behind one's head in the photos and add some soft touch. We had some irritated moments setting this up and trying to communicate our different visions to our setup crews but it ended up so beautiful.
These remembrance flowers were for our deceased, and absent, grandparents. My idea was that during the ceremony, our celebrant would hand four white flowers to Matt for each of his deceased grandparents, and three white flowers (for my deceased grandparents and step-grandfather) and one blue flower for my absent grandmother, and we'd put them in vases on either side of the alter. I envisioned the flowers being a little more independent but when I finally saw them, they looked like bunches on the same strand and seemed like that would be cumbersome for our officiant or us to try to separate, so we ended up just nodding at them behind us. And a few minutes later they blew over in a strong wind. Some people thought maybe it was the grandparents acknowledging that they were present.

Matt LOVES cookies. In fact, the first time he officially said "I love you," we were in his kitchen and I'd just made him some cookies and he said, "I love cookies... and I love you!" So I thought it would be fun and cute to have a cookie tray as our guests arrived for the ceremony. A little pre-wedding sweetness.

This was a people mingle bingo game in which you had to find another wedding guest who met the fact listed (e.g. grew up in Bend, is related to the bride, is in the military). The first one to complete it won a prize. Unfortunately we couldn't find the person we charged to be the gift distributor so when the son of Matt's acquaintance won, I had to speedy quick find him a gift. Well it kept that boy busy at least :)

We ended up feeling a bit rushed, or at least I did. I opted out of having my hair and makeup professionally done (and glad I did!). My new mother-in-law Susan did a beautiful job on my makeup (gold smokey eyes) and my bridesmaid Mandy did an awesome job putting the finishing touches on my hair.

And thanks to my aunt Carolyn some last minute broken jewelry was repaired!

My valentine's day gift from my fiance

We made a necklace and earrings to go with the bracelet.

Dad's first look

The Readings from Our Wedding*

Corinthians 13 - read by my Matron of Honor and dear friend Jennifer
(this is one religious reading that came to my mind, which I have always loved, and Jenn asked to read it- perfect) :

Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous;
love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly;
it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered,
does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth;
bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails...But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love.


"I Love You" by Roy Croft - read by my Bridesmaid and dear friend Jessecca
(this is the reading, of everything I found and read, that spoke most to me, and was the one in a long list that Jesse chose- she knows me) :

I love you, not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you.
I love you, not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me.
I love you, for the part of me that you bring out.
I love you, for putting your hand into my heaped-up heart, and passing over all the foolish, weak things that you can’t help dimly seeing there, and for drawing out, into the light, all the beautiful belongings that no one else had looked quite far enough to find.
I love you, because you are helping me to make of the lumber of my life, not a tavern, but a temple. Out of the works of my every day, not a reproach, but a song.
I love you, because you have done more than any creed could have done to make me good, and more than any fate could have done to make me happy. You have done it without a touch, without a word, without a sign. You have done it by being yourself. Perhaps that is what being a friend means, after all.


"The Art of a Good Marriage" by Wilferd Arlan Peterson - read by Matt's stepmom Pam
(I love this reading too. I love the "forming a circle" and "being the right partner"- I was very happy Pam offered to read this) :

A good marriage must be created.
In marriage the "little" things are the big things.
It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say, ”I love you" at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is having a mutual sense of values, and common objectives.
It is standing together and facing the world.
It is forming a circle that gathers in the whole family.
It is speaking words of appreciation, and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is not only marrying the right person -- it is being the right partner.

Our Vows*

We wrote our own vows to reflect what we wanted:

I... take you...
to love and cherish you,
to comfort and encourage you,
to honor and respect you,
to be patient and kind with you,
to honor our differences,
to forgive,
to give thanks for you every day,
to do my share in making our lives together healthy
and full of love and joy,
in times of happiness and times of sorrow,
in sickness and in health,
in good times and in bad,
for all the days of my life.

Wedding Day 5K*

Since we met running, when we saw there was a 5K on our wedding morning, we decided we had to sign up! Hey Mom did suggest maybe I should take a run that morning to release any stress before the big day started... so why not do it publicly? The race was a 5K as part of the Three Sisters Marathon... Matt originally suggested we should do the full marathon. Ummm no.

AND wearing adorable t-shirts while we're at it...

In fact I had a whole outfit complete with veil (thanks to one of my bachelorette parties), white running skirt, and a garter I made just for Matt out of an old Nike headband (never really used) and some ribbon (in our wedding colors of green and light blue).

I'd emailed the race directors to let them know they were part of our special day. That meant we were mini celebrities, which was sorta fun. The announcer and photographer were on the lookout for us, and since we dressed up, we were hard to miss.

We ran the race nearly stride for stride... ahhh. It was a fairly small race and we were comfortably in 3rd place nearly the whole time.

It wasn't spontaneous... we'd actually discussed several times that we were going to cross the finish line together, holding hands.
Incidentally it's more difficult than it looks.
We finished in 23:36 according to Matt's phone GPS. That's a little faster than 8 min/mile.

Because we were so far ahead of #4, they had us go back and cross with Matt carrying me. I've never seen the pics from the front.

Also funny, when you finish, you tear off a section of your bib that an official takes and places on a stick, to keep track of the order of finishers so they can later type it up. Matt and I were walking up to that person together and the announcer on a loud speaker said "Now Matt, first lesson in marriage, always let her go first." Haha! The official record listed me as #3 in 24:03 and Matt as #4 in 24:04.
Our groomsman Dave and our matron-of-honor Jenn's husband both ran the race as well, so Jenn was at the finish line with her sons to take pictures. Chase and Ryan were our "ring guards" who walked our dachshunds Zoey & Ellie, who were carrying the rings, down the aisle. Here Chase (what a sweetie!) surprised me with a flower.

Matt's my support, literally ;)

Matt was VERY specific about what he wanted the back of his shirt to say: "I'm getting married today at 4:00. June 4, 2011"

The back of my shirt said: "Getting Hitched TODAY June 4, 2011"

Then we stopped by the site to see how setup was going.